I fill several roles in my life. I am a husband, father, son, brother, friend, colleague, pastor, mentor, coach, neighbor. The list could continue, but you get the point. More times than I care to admit two or more of those roles conflict with each other. Adding to the complexity, conflicting roles can change by the day; the hour, even.

Maybe you experience the same thing from time to time. How do we decide which role takes precedent? Which of our roles is more important than the others? The answer lies in what Sociologists call self-awareness.

Self-awareness is an individual’s understanding of their personality and individuality. (Miriam-Webster Online) Having a healthy and God-defined self-awareness helps us navigate through the conflicting demands others often place on us.

Developing a God-Centered Self-Awareness

Here are four things you need to know to develop a healthy self-awareness.

1. Know WHOSE you are.

Of all the roles I fill, none matters more in life than my position as a Child of God. I belong first and foremost to God. The Bible teaches that I am not my own, but God paid a high price for me to be His. (1 Corinthians 7:23)

Because I belong to Him, He has first claim on my time, attention, resources, and decisions. As His child, the most important pursuit of my life is nurturing my relationship with Him. Lately (and thankfully) I have read a lot about self-care – physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.   I will dedicate a blog soon to self-care.

Suffice it to say, when my life is conflicted, my first consideration is my position as God’s child. My relationship to Him takes precedent over all others.

2. Know WHO you are.

God created each of us uniquely. We each possess different skill sets, strengths, and weaknesses. Life experiences have shaped each of us in ways that make us one of a kind.

Often others try to shame us or manipulate us into acting outside of our strengths and skill-set. Self-awareness helps us understand who we are and, hopefully, avoid the frustration of trying to be someone whom we are not.

Own both your strengths and weaknesses. Recognize your unique skill-set and do not try to become something you are not.  Take comfort in your positive personality traits and use them in ways that glorify God.

“Today, you are you. That is truer than true. No one on earth is you-er than YOU.” – Dr. Seuss.

3. Know WHERE you are.

A large part of self-awareness is an honest assessment of our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health. We invite frustration when we lie to ourselves about our health in any dimension of our lives.  How can we better ourselves if we fail to admit and expose areas that need to get better?

By default, your GPS provides directions to your destination beginning with where you are. If you ask it for directions from any other location, you will get lost along the way. Similarly, self-awareness allows us to begin where we are, so that we can move toward God’s destination for us.

4. Know WHY you are here.

The Apostle Paul provided a sterling example of a man with purpose.

“But I consider my life of no value to myself; my purpose is to finish my course and the ministry I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of God’s grace.” – Acts 20:24

He had such self-awareness that he realized his mission and would not allow circumstances to distract him. When demands conflicted with each other in his life, Paul’s sense of personal mission enables him to make wise choices.

I want to encourage you to establish a personal mission statement. The statement should be specific, attainable, and actionable. Describe what you believe God wants to do through you.

We can distinguish between conflicting demands by what we believe is God’s purpose for our lives.

Click here to read about life direction in Fulfilling My Purpose for Life.

Building Your Self-Awareness

What about you? How would you rate your self-awareness? I encourage you to consider the four questions below to strengthen your self-awareness and eliminate conflicting demands and expectations.

As always, feel free to leave a comment and share what you have learned about your own self-awareness.

1. How does your position as a child of God affect your other relationships? How does realizing whose you are help you understand your other roles?
2. What are three of your strengths? What are two of your weaknesses?
3. How healthy are you spiritually? Emotionally? Physically?
4. Write a 20-word or less sentence stating your purpose in life.